Should You Divulge a Disability in Your Dating Profile?

Death, Sex & Money

Slate Podcasts

Business, Health & Fitness, Society & Culture, Careers, Relationships, Sexuality

4.6 • 7.6K Ratings

🗓️ 24 December 2024

⏱️ 59 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Todd is looking for love, but he’s unsure about disclosing something in dating profiles: his multiple sclerosis. On Slate’s How To podcast, Todd got some crucial advice from Jessica Slice and Caroline Cupp, authors of Dateable: Swiping Right, Hooking Up, and Settling Down While Chronically Ill and Disabled. This week, we’re sharing that wonderful episode with Death, Sex & Money listeners, and to kick things off, Anna talks to Carvell Wallace (the host of How To) about what makes this episode special. Listeners may remember Carvell from his appearance on DSM earlier this year. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Reach out to the How To podcast at [email protected] or leave them a voicemail at 646-495-4001. How To’s executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is their senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrae. Anna and Carvell’s conversation was produced by Cameron Drews. The rest of the DSM team includes Andrew Dunn, Zoe Azulay, and Daisy Rosario. Here’s the estate planning checklist that Carvell mentions in the episode and the full episode of How To about estate planning. And here’s the episode featuring Carvell’s son – it’s delightful. To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. Ad Disclosure in Podcast Description: A Bond Account is a self-directed brokerage account with Public Investing, member FINRA/SIPC. Deposits into this account are used to purchase 10 investment-grade and high-yield bonds. As of 9/26/24, the average, annualized yield to worst (YTW) across the Bond Account is greater than 6%. A bond’s yield is a function of its market price, which can fluctuate; therefore, a bond’s YTW is not “locked in” until the bond is purchased, and your yield at time of purchase may be different from the yield shown here. The “locked in” YTW is not guaranteed; you may receive less than the YTW of the bonds in the Bond Account if you sell any of the bonds before maturity or if the issuer defaults on the bond. Public Investing charges a markup on each bond trade. See our Fee Schedule. Bond Accounts are not recommendations of individual bonds or default allocations. The bonds in the Bond Account have not been selected based on your needs or risk profile. See https://public.com/disclosures/bond-account to learn more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	One of my favorite episodes that we made this year was called Sex Parties and Shakespeare with Carvel Wallace.
0:08.6	Carvel is a writer, and I was talking to him about his wonderful memoir called Another Word for Love.
0:15.8	Carvel is also a colleague of mine at Slate.
0:18.7	He co-hosts the podcast How To. And this week, we're going to share
0:22.8	an episode that he hosted about disability and dating. But first, I want to tell you about
0:29.1	another cool thing from the Slate family, new in our Slate Plus feed this week. Mary Harris hosts Slate's
0:36.8	news show called What Next? And she invited me to come on and
0:40.6	talk about the catharsis of karaoke. And we listen through to picks from other Slate writers and
0:47.3	contributors for the karaoke songs that they need to belt out right now in this moment in our
0:53.0	history. You can hear it by joining Slate Plus,
0:56.9	and you've heard me say this. What you're supporting is all of us who do work at Slate. We thank
1:02.8	you for being a member of Slate Plus with ad-free listening to all of Slate's podcast and with
1:08.4	special exclusive drops like this week's karaoke holiday party. You can sign up at slate.com
1:15.0	slash DSM Plus or you can join right from the Death, Sex, and Money show page on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify.
1:23.5	But back to Carvel Wallace and the work he does at Slate on the podcast How To. That show, like
1:30.9	Death, Sex and Money, has rich conversations with listeners. People write in with questions and problems.
1:38.5	And then the host introduced those listeners to an expert who can help them. And then they all
1:43.8	talk through the problem together on the show.
1:46.7	You know, you do this on your show too, and I think that we're trying to do this a lot on how to, which is like most of our troubles with like intimacy and just like the difficult sort of squishy stuff of life has to do with fear, some kind of like fear of being seen,
2:05.6	fear of not being loved, fear of being rejected.
2:08.6	And these fears go way back to, you know, early times in our lives,
2:12.6	and at some point we learn to fear this social rejection, whatever form it is.
	...

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