How to Know if You’re a High Functioning Codependent and What You Can Do About It with Psychotherapist Terri Cole

Earn Your Happy

Lori Harder

Business, Entrepreneurship

4.6 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 15 January 2025

⏱️ 66 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Are you constantly taking responsibility for other people’s feelings, problems, or successes? You might be a high-functioning codependent. In this episode, psychotherapist Terri Cole is back sharing the sneaky pattern of overgiving and over-functioning that leads to burnout, resentment, and even sabotage your relationships and career. She breaks down how to recognize these behaviors and start your recovery. We talk about how to set boundaries, stop controlling outcomes, and prioritize self-care in a way that feels empowering. Get ready to stop fixing everyone else and start prioritizing yourself. Check out our Sponsors: Open Phone - Stop juggling all your customer calls and texts from your personal phone. Save 20% off your first 6 months when you go to openphone.com/earn Rocket Money - go to rocketmoney.com/EYH to check out the personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 What does high-functioning codependency (HFC) look like? 06:00 Signs you might be an HFC. 11:30 How auto-advice giving creates resentment in relationships. 17:30 The difference between compromise and self-abandonment in partnerships. 25:00 How to stop trying to control others and reclaim your peace. 31:45 The red flags of taking on too much emotional responsibility. 39:00 Ways to deal with guilt when you feel you “should” do more. 45:00 How to improve your relationships by breaking the over-functioning cycle. 49:00 The FREE toolkit to help you start setting boundaries today! RESOURCES Learn more about Terri’s Free HFC Toolkit HERE Get your copy of Terri’s “Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency” HERE Listen to my free SECRET PODCASTS SERIES - Operation: Rekindle This B*tch Get glōci HERE Use code: HAPPY at checkout for 25% off! Text DAILY to 310-496-8363 for daily manifesting affirmations, journal prompts, and motivation. Sign up for GrowthDay - https://www.growthday.com/lori?via=harder Watch on YouTube - @LoriHarder My book: A Tribe Called Bliss FOLLOW Follow me: @loriharder Follow Earn Your Happy: @earnyourhappy Follow glōci: @getgloci Girlfriends & Business: @girlfriendsandbusiness Follow Terri: @terricole

Transcript

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0:00.0	There's a different flavor of codependency for modern women, and I knew it so well because it was my own flavor.
0:06.5	It was what I had experienced in my life, which is you being overly invested in the feeling states, the outcomes, the circumstances, the finances, the situations, the careers of the people in your life, to the detriment of your own internal peace.
0:24.8	So what does that mean? It means as women, as empaths, as lovers, as friends, as daughters,
0:32.4	as aunties, as all the things, of course we're invested in our people being happy. We love them.
0:38.2	We want them to get what they want in lives, you know? I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about when you're in
0:41.5	HFC, as we call it. It's more than that. We go from, I want you to get what you want, Lori,
0:48.1	to I feel responsible for you getting what you want, Lori. I feel responsible for how you feel.
1:06.0	Hey, everyone.
1:07.1	Welcome back to the Earn Your Happy podcast.
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2:12.6	And while there are amazing things that happen topically for your skin,
2:17.0	hyluronic acid is something that your body actually naturally creates,
	...

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