(Rewind): The #1 SIGN That Relationship WON'T LAST & How To End It...
Love Life with Matthew Hussey
Matthew Hussey
4.8 • 2.9K Ratings
🗓️ 21 February 2025
⏱️ 21 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Not a day goes by that someone doesn’t ask me this question in one form or another.
Why? Because few things in life involve more gut-wrenching second-guessing than deciding when to quit a relationship.
With heightened emotions and conflicting intuitions, it’s no wonder this situation gives our hearts and minds disorienting whiplash . . . all while wasting our most precious resource: time.
Today’s Rewind episode could end up saving you months or even years of pain by providing you with the questions you should be asking when making this big decision.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | If I left the moment things were bad, then I'm the kind of person that doesn't try to get through difficult times in a relationship. Welcome to the Love Live Podcast. It's me, Matthew Hussey. Enjoy this classic clip from our archives. |
| 0:35.8 | And if you want to let me know what you think or how this |
| 0:37.7 | podcast is helping you, don't forget to leave me a review on iTunes under the Love Life podcast. |
| 0:44.0 | Enjoy. |
| 0:48.1 | I was training the other day and the person I was training with said to me, you know, Matt, why is it that people |
| 0:55.9 | tend to hold on to relationships longer than they should? And why so often do those people, when |
| 1:05.8 | they leave a relationship, immediately jump into another one? Like there's this uncanny ability to find someone |
| 1:15.5 | weeks, within me weeks of your breakup and then jump straight into another relationship. |
| 1:22.9 | What do you, how do you see this? I think I've heard it called before a long time ago monkey branching where you don't want to let go of, well, I suppose that's the idea of not letting go of the existing branch until you have another one lined up. |
| 1:37.3 | So I suppose monkey branching might be a little more referential of the idea of literally teeing someone else up before you leave. |
| 1:48.1 | But there's a similar concept going on there. What do you think's happening? |
| 1:52.3 | With the people who just jump into one in relationship from another. |
| 1:55.2 | Let's start with why do you think someone won't let go of a relationship? |
| 1:59.7 | I think the won't letting go one is more common in a way because I think we as human beings |
| 2:05.6 | struggle to let go of things when we should. |
| 2:08.5 | There's a famous psychological bias called the sunk cost fallacy or the, what is it, loss |
| 2:15.3 | aversion effect, right? |
| 2:16.5 | It's an endowment effect, they call it, where the things |
| 2:19.7 | we have are hard to let go of even when they're bad for us. That could be a job you should quit. |
| 2:25.3 | It can be a relationship, it can be possessions. It's we instinctively feel the pain of the thing |
| 2:32.7 | we have if we lose it. Oh no, maybe that thing was essential to my |
| 2:37.3 | survival. Maybe that was a terrible decision and I can't get it back. And, you know, when you're |
... |
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